After watching hands-down the most disgraceful NBA Dunk Contest EVER, I tore out my eyeballs. Ok, I thought I had enough of the NBA with it's yellow fever for Jeremy-"I can't make a layup"-Lin, but this is the last straw. I'm not even going to post a picture OR a video of that funk contest. With that being said, here is my appeal to David "Skid Mark" Stern which I'll be emailing to him for the next 364 days.
Dear Sir/Ma'am,
Please take a few million off your personal salary next year and dish out some serious $$$ to get some REAL athletes in the dunk contest. I'm talking Kobe, Durant, B-Griffin, and that Baby-Back-Bitch Lebron. Hell, I'd like to see anyone from the all-star game (sans Kevin Love) compete in the dunk contest. I miss the days of MJ vs Dominique or even Vince vs T-Mac vs Stevie Franchise. I place ALL of the blame squarely on your fat portly shoulders. Stop ruining the greatest game on earth by letting these players be a bunch of overpaid, lazy, cocky, douche sacks.
Sincerely,
$toney 'Mutha-Dunkin' Jones
Dear Sir/Ma'am,
Please take a few million off your personal salary next year and dish out some serious $$$ to get some REAL athletes in the dunk contest. I'm talking Kobe, Durant, B-Griffin, and that Baby-Back-Bitch Lebron. Hell, I'd like to see anyone from the all-star game (sans Kevin Love) compete in the dunk contest. I miss the days of MJ vs Dominique or even Vince vs T-Mac vs Stevie Franchise. I place ALL of the blame squarely on your fat portly shoulders. Stop ruining the greatest game on earth by letting these players be a bunch of overpaid, lazy, cocky, douche sacks.
Sincerely,
$toney 'Mutha-Dunkin' Jones
KOBE: "Hey Lebron, do you like apples?" LEBRON: "Uhh, yeah, I guess." KOBE: "Well, I just dunked on your ass, so go fist yourself."