"Yeah, go ahead and watch whatever you want Dakota. Just leave Mommy alone so she can talk on the phone. Oh, and don't forget to do your chores - you still have to mop the halls, take out the trash and do the laundry."
Billy will now be attending AA meetings for the remainder of his life.
This is how a real Mom rolls. Don't worry, I think it is safe to assume that the bodyguard saved the baby's hat from falling.
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