After returning home, I received an urgent phone call from my estranged cousin, who also happens to be the Mayor of Boogertown, NC. He informed me that I would need to pack up all my things immediately as he had knowledge that certain people of interest were looking for me. As I was gripped with panic and started heading for the door, I heard him say that at least 7 bigfoots (or is it bigfeet??) were headed my way. I don't think I would have been so easy to fool had it not been for the 8 shots of gin I had just consumed.
The stress of the call from my cousin lead me to the airport where I hopped on a plane to Saltillo, Mexico. After doing countless tequila shots on my connecting flight through Texas, I wound up at a bull fight late last night. After countless drunk texts between me and my man Val Kilmer, I decided to call it a night and wound up sleeping on the street next to this guy:
Viva el toro!!!
Stoney 'el cucuy' Jones